Moms, we can be students, too. You can follow your educational dreams.
I see my daughter in college and remember myself at that age. She is fully enjoying her college experience, and I love seeing her learn and grow. She was telling me about some of her classes, and she mentioned that there were a lot of older adults in one of them. It made me think of my days as a student, an adult student, and a mom student, and I found that I was proud of those adults for following their dreams.
College wasn’t traditional for me. It did start that way though. I was accepted to a university straight from high school with plans of finishing my degree in four years, then on to grad school and whatever else life had in store for me. That’s where the traditional path stopped.
The summer after graduation before school was to start, I found out that I would be a mom and a student.
I went to school as planned but quickly learned that I needed something that better fit my situation. I was working, and what time I had left was spent with my little one. It was best for me and my daughter for me to take some time off. I worked and I loved on my little girl.
» » » » » » » » » » » » » RELATED READ: You Are Enough, Working Mom « « « « « « « « « « « «
I tried to go back to community college a few times, but it just didn’t work. Eventually, “some” time off turned into a few years off. After a few more kids and a few more years, I looked into school again and enrolled in an online program. I wasn’t sure exactly how it would work, but I knew I wanted to do it. I knew I needed to do it.
I wanted to prove to my kids that it could be done. Being a teen mom, I had statistics to prove wrong.
I wanted to show them that goals and dreams could still be achieved even though we chose different paths to those dreams. I also wanted to prove it to myself, to show myself that I could do it.
The reality was that I was a mom and I could be a student, too. I so often hear moms saying that their career and educational dreams are beyond their reach. And I wanted to be an example of how that was not the case.
I also hear often that school is something they will pursue after their kids are grown.
We as moms set our dreams aside to help others fulfill theirs. There is not anything wrong with this, but our dreams matter too. Moms, continuing our education is a possibility.
You don’t necessarily have to go to a two or four-year institution. School isn’t just for educational goals. You can take classes to learn a hobby, an interest, or a new skill. This is an investment in yourself and an investment in your family.
There are some things to remember:
It takes time and discipline.
Fit coursework in when you can: soccer practice, lunch breaks, and after bedtime.
Homework takes on a new meaning as an adult.
Find a group. Moms who are in the same situation as you are. Pull in your support system.
Look into scholarships for mom students and employer tuition programs.
Challenge yourself but remember that you’re human. Set realistic standards and expectations for yourself.
Give yourself grace. Put taking care of yourself on your to-do list.
I’m never going to say that being a mom and a student is easy–it’s not. But I will say that it’s worth it. Don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Maybe you’re ready to make that decision, maybe it’s not time yet. Both are okay. Just know that when the time is right, it’s an accomplishment within your reach.
Now I’m on the other side as a college professor for an online program, and I can relate to the moms who are in the position I once was. I love that I can be an advocate and an encourager for all my students. When it comes to my working parents trying to reach their goals, I can say “I get it.” And I can say “You can do this.”
Moms you can be a student, too. Whether now or later, you have it in you.
The opinions expressed in this post are those of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of ABQ Mom, its executive team, other contributors to the site, its sponsors or partners, or any organizations the aforementioned might be affiliated with.
