My Pregnancy Over 40: What I’ve Learned (Part 1)

You may have heard the term “Geriatric Pregnancy”? Interestingly, it’s now called “Advanced Maternal Age” (AMA). I guess that does sound better, but I still just say pregnancy.

I am older–over 40 now–and I just had our fifth baby. In my research, I realized that when I was pregnant with our last baby, I was at an AMA also because I was over 35! At age 35, a pregnant woman is monitored more closely for certain risks.

I had some concerns being 40+ and pregnant and then having a new baby at home with our other four children. Being at an “Advanced Maternal Age” has taught me a lot.

What Would Others Think?

When we confirm we are pregnant, so many thoughts come–like when and how will we tell others? Fears of what others might think of us can dampen our happy news. Before I entered my 40s, someone told me that you start caring less what others think about you at 40. But when I got pregnant, an initial thought was, “What are people going to say?”

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I feared comments around my age (AMA), number of children, and other comments I made up. Sharing the happy news of a baby-on-the-way should be something you do in your own way and time. You cannot control others but you can control your own focus and response.

Those who care about you will be happy and will be there for you.

How Will My Body Do?

After dealing with those initial thoughts, then might come concerns about how your body would handle the pregnancy. You definitely can feel your body aging and changing in different ways, but I didn’t really have much reason to doubt my body. It was mostly a matter of keeping my thoughts in check, especially because I had my first experience with panic attacks just months before. I think sleep apnea had something to do with that.

Also, my fourth baby’s birth was my hardest delivery (she came after a lot of pain), and every now and again, I would remember that and battle some anxious thoughts. Thank God it subsided. If you are struggling with any anxious thoughts while pregnant, please reach out to others. My husband, other family members, and my midwives were there for me to talk to.

How Will I Meet the Needs of All of My Kids?

We are a homeschooling family, and I already knew we would need to take a break when the baby would come. (And that’s okay!) None of us thought baby would come so soon though. I’m thankful we have flexibility in our schedule. We were able to take a break from lessons and just do life with a new baby together for a while. Now we resumed our studies and have a little routine going while still being flexible.

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Our eldest just entered his teen years, and our youngest (before the baby) is in kindergarten. They are such a big help. We will always have a lot going on as a family of seven. Things can get overwhelming at times, but we always find a way to make it work. In motherhood we are always learning alongside our children. If you have multiple children, you may learn they are far more capable than you thought to handle changes, and they can be the biggest help.

This pregnancy taught me that our minds and bodies are able to endure so much and still be strong while making another little human to love.

We never know how things will turn out but can be sure that with some preparation, we will be equipped to handle things that come our way. Don’t beat yourself up when things don’t go as planned. Read Part 2 of my story to hear about some of the unexpected twists and turns I experienced in this pregnancy.

The opinions expressed in this post are those of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of ABQ Mom, its executive team, other contributors to the site, its sponsors or partners, or any organizations the aforementioned might be affiliated with.