Quality Time: Savoring the Little Things Amidst the Chaos

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If I had to guess if you’re reading this blog, you’re probably living the same busy mom life as I am and can probably relate to where I’m at. As a working mom, I find myself far too busy, far too often. That’s been especially true for me lately.

It isn’t profound to say that I’ve forgotten to “stop and smell the roses,” and I don’t think I’m alone in that.

I find myself searching for little moments of quality time with my kids. With three kids under five and a full time job, I feel like I spend (max!) an hour of quality time with my kids on weekdays. That’s right. An hour!

Here’s an example of an ideal weekday for my family:

6:30 am –  big kids wake up, get dressed, and eat breakfast
7:00 am –  baby wake up and eats
7:30 am –  ready for the day
8:15 am –  drop-off kids at preschool
8:25 am –  arrive at work
12:00 pm – lunch with coworkers
5:15 pm – leave work, pick up kids at preschool
6:05 pm – get home, eat dinner
6:45 pm – start baby’s bedtime routine, in bed by 7 pm
7:30 pm – start big kids’ bedtime routine, in bed by 8 pm

Not a lot of quality time in there, unless you’re seeing something that I’m not. It’s all getting them ready for school or getting them ready for bed, but no time to connect. Weekends are better for that, of course, but weekdays go by in a flash.

» » » »  RECOMMENDED RESOURCE: Guide to Albuquerque Preschools and Childcare  « « « «

And the reality is that the “ideal” schedule is not the reality. By the time we get to the end of the day, I’m usually grateful that they’re in bed and asleep. And grateful for my husband and I to have a little peace and quiet before we crash.

Savoring the Little Things Amidst the ChaosThe real schedule we experience most days is more like this:

6:30 am – big kids wake up and pick out clothes for what feels like an hour, get dressed, and start breakfast
7:00 am – baby wakes up, eats, spits up, and wants to eat again
7:30 am – ready for the day
7:50 am – actually get in the car and leave after several distractions including, but not limited to: getting out of the car and back in after an extra trip to the potty, finding what book to take to school, picking out a pair of clip-on earrings, picking out a different pair of clip-on earrings, or choosing a different jacket and then deciding the original jacket we had was the one they wanted
8:15 am – drop-off at preschool, keep kids from running into the parking lot (which really only works if I get the closest parking spot to the door), rush to get kids to their classrooms, momentarily regret my decisions to use cloth diapers, cloth wipes, and breastfeed because the other moms can just leave a stash of stuff at school for their babies, head to work
8:25 am – arrive at work, sprint upstairs to give an out-of-breath overview of my day at morning stand-up meeting, get some work done
9:30 am – pumping time
11:00 am – stress out because I’m still trying to finish my first bottle of water for the day
12:00 pm – possibly take a break to eat lunch with coworkers or eat lunch at my desk
12:30 pm – pumping time, again!
3:00 pm – pump one more time (if I wait too long, the baby will get mad that there isn’t enough milk at bedtime, resulting in me checking the time every two minutes around this time of day)
5:15 pm – leave work, pick-up at preschool
5:20 pm – pick-up the baby, beg the oldest to leave the classroom while the baby screams from her car seat and the middlest (my term for the middle child) waits outside his classroom with his teacher
5:40 pm – finally get in the car after chasing one or two children down the sidewalk
6:05 pm – try to keep the big kids from fighting for just two more minutes while driving through the neighborhood
6:07 pm – have the oldest scream at me that they want dad to get them out of the car instead of me, have the middlest start crying because he doesn’t want dad to get him out
6:10 pm – change out of work clothes so they don’t get messy at dinner, take a few moments to breathe after a trying drive home
6:15 pm – beg the kids to sit down at the dinner table to have even two bites of dinner
6:20 pm – give up and just eat dinner with the baby
6:45 pm – bed time routine with the baby, in bed by 7 pm
7:30 pm – big kids’ bed time routine, in bed by 8pm, extra potty break for the middlest, spend 20 minutes picking out new pjs with the oldest because she changed her mind

Seeing any quality time in there that I’m missing? I often feel grateful they’re in bed and asleep after all that–and I hate that. I enjoy my kids, I do. It feels like all I’m doing is getting them ready for school and getting them ready for bed.

» » » » » » »  RELATED READ: Managing Mom Guilt: Do I Enjoy My Kids Enough?  « « « « « « «

The Things I Don’t Want to Miss

The oldest started singing full songs and repeating random movie lines that she thinks are funny.

My middlest has started giving me a kiss on the nose at bedtime and asking for one in return.

And the baby is rocking back and forth trying so hard to crawl and telling the cutest babbling stories about who knows what.

I’m trying to slow down and enjoy these sweet moments because I don’t want to miss this.



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